I like the ME that I See

Over year ago I was still living in Florida, working my real estate job and living my life as a full time single mom to the rugrats, carrying on the long distance relationship with Mr. Man as we got reaquainted with each other all over again. We were together at least every other weekend for 18 months, he came to Florida most weekends, I traveled too. We loved meeting on Tybee Island for Honeymoon weekends!  

Halloween 2009 ~ I was in a wheelchair and they took turns pushing, I was still able to be a part of the Trick or Treat Fun!

During the week, the kids and I stayed busy as ever with a packed schedule. I kept us occupied and doing things together; We had library night weekly, BFF dinner night, Spaghetti night with the kids sometimes,  Mexican dinner night out most weeks and the monthly Art Walk down town as well as events going on at the beach, we were there if at all possible. I always tried to have as much FUN with the rugrats and their friends as possible. Mr. Man fit nicely into our family and spent time with my daughter one on one at the Pier fishing as well as taking the time to get to know my teenage son and ALL his friends.

  ME with my son May 2010 ( hard to get him to take a photo with mom any more)

There were many extra rugrats (teenagers) in our home; since my son was in 7th grade, he asked if a kid could stay with us for a bit because his mom lived in a hotel and his friend was riding a city bus to get to the school bus stop out side our apartments. I said yes and that began the consistent flow of kids that were in need for many years. Our house was always FULL of extra bodies but they were safe and that made me happy ~ The Ultimate  "Paying It Forward" that I could do! I miss my extra 'kids', I love them all and think about them, still worry about some.... and pray for them all (Another Blog subject entirely)

ME in 2001 ~ I've come a LONG way since his Middle School years!!!

As I prepared for Open house tonight for my daughter's 7th grade year, I looked in the mirror at an entirely different person from 1 year ago and way different from the woman I was 8 years ago as I took my son to Middle school.

I like the woman I see; wise beyond her years, compassionate and empathetic, more calm and relaxed about life, accepting of the good and the bad, the happy and the sad. Knowledge of self really opens your eyes to others, I think its like the quote I read once says...What we see in others is a direct reflection of ourselves, good and bad.

ME in November 2008 ~ I took this and framed it as a gift for MR. Man

What I see in others that I like, I can try to emulate because that is a reflection of who I want to be, if it is something I don't like , I realize its something I need to work on within myself. There is always room for improvement and as I mature, I will continually look for the good in others so I can learn from them.

ME with my Daughter March 2010 ~ We both celebrated Birthdays ~ she is now 12 =)

The lines in my face, the body that is now 40,  the stubborn white hair that I have to cover up, the aches and pains, the body parts that just don't work like they used to or stay the same, but nothing stays the same, change is inevitable!  I look at these photos and see how much the rugrats have grown in just the last 2 years. I am proud to be their Mom ~ they challenge me and encourage me without even being aware of the impact it has on my life, to have the privilege of giving them life still amazes me sometimes! 

I embrace it, it is challenging but necessary for us to evolve and grow so we can live to our full potential! 

ME with Mr. Man on Tybee Island for his 41st Birthday celebration!

I like the ME that I See  ~ 5 years ago I would not have imagined feeling this way!

It's another one of those miracles in my life.....I am Blessed!

Summertime is fleeting....

It's been a whirlwind of a summer and I feel like it is flying by at warp speed!!! Being in a long distance relationship had its perks but it had its downfalls too just like everything else in life....

I feel like I am always living out of my suitcase, even when I am home, I am never quite unpacked completely. I told my sweetheart this past weekend that we are going to have to schedule our time more wisely in the next few months, I need to be home with my kids too and don't want them to feel neglected! Its not cheap to be a road warrior like we have been and if we are to get ahead, we will have to sacrifice time together ~ Couples in the military do it all the time and don't have the freedom to just hop in a car and drive to see their loved one, we just need to be smart about it too! It sucks to be practical but somebody has to do it!

Savanna had been with her Dad since the end of June and when I got her back from her Dad's last night, she was having a tough time of it....I cannot imagine how hard it must be for her to get switched around like this! It is one of the many elements of divorce that is so very unpleasant. Her Father & I are the most opposite people (sometimes opposites attract for ALL the wrong reasons!) and she is literally going back and forth between two worlds! I hope and pray for her sake that she survives this and ends up ok...

So many things to do and it seems like there is never enough time but we still manage to get things done ~ the important things that is....

I am going to make a move that will bring a really big change in our lives hopefully by the end of this year and it is scary and exciting all at the same time. Its a BIG step for Frankie and I and the kids too...I feel like we are going into this with our eyes wide open and we do preventative stuff as we can, pre marital questionnaires are something we do to get to know each other better... I know that since we both suffered tremendously within our previous marriages that we are both determined to make this work, we know we can and are willing to do what it takes.

There is no 'Magic 8 Ball' to lead the way, just two people with prayerful hearts and the sincerity to do it right this time! I feel like we were meant to share this life with each other and feel blessed way beyond anything I ever deserved!

I am still struggling with the healing of my foot, it has really changed every aspect of my life completely and I am still trying to learn how to accept the limitations I now have due to my physical condition. Looking for employment is even difficult because I am not sure what I am capable of and don't want to get into something that I cannot handle. I am trusting that I will make the right choices for everyone involved and I know that I am a tough cookie and I will survive as I always have!

CHANGE ~ THE STUFF LIFE IS MADE OF :)

SEXY LEGS IN HEELS ~ I MISS THIS!

i miss my blog!!!! I have been super busy with work & home & kids & missing my honey and trying to deal with this 'black cloud of accidents' that seems to be hovering over me!! Last Friday morning I had just dropped Savanna off @ school and I was in a car accident just a few blocks away that resulted in my car being a total loss!! BYe BYe my baby Lexus!!
Thankfully I was not hurt except for a nasty bump on the head and the lady involved had her coffee spilled on her...silver linings :) I had to call the ex-factor to help me out with transportation and he was happy to be called by me for any help at all... He did take me to school for the 5th grade monthly luncheon that I was not going to miss if I could help it, even with a bump on the head and an icepack in my purse!! He offered to take me to lunch but when I wanted to discuss Savanna's future in Middle School next year he decided to take me home. I am PROUD as a peacock of Savanna for making such good grades this year and taking school more seriously ~ she has expressed interest in the Miss Teen Jacksonville pageant and I am willing to take her for initial interviews but will not get sucked into the money pit of pageants ~ I would rather take her on a vacation!!

SAVANNA WITH HER BFF TJ TURNER (they have been friends since they were babies)

She is growing up soo very fast....I get teary eyed knowing that the little girl years are almost completely behind us...I feel that she is better adjusted than she has ever been since her dad and I divorced ~ She gets to witness first hand how 2 people treat each other when the love is really there and I am thankful for that too :)

Frankie was coming into town later Friday and was here to take me to purchase a used car before he left Sunday afternoon. We always enjoy our weekend honeymoons but are looking forward to sharing the same address before the year is over ♥ We went to an old Theatre Friday night ~enjoyed a late brunch Saturday and then a nice walk on the beach ~ watched the 'Bucket List' movie Saturday afternoon which was a great movie I highly recommend it ~ I will be working on my own 'bucket list' for future reference...and then our weekend was over 'till next time.... I may surprise him this weekend and just show up in Cola town... we'll see :) otherwise it will be Valentines weekend before we are together again.

Since the accidental fall almost 6 months ago things in my life have changed pretty drastically...I was a skirt & heels gal almost EVERY day and now I am wearing blue jeans and boots (thank God its winter right now) not sure what I am going to do when warmer weather gets here for good and that is early in the year in Florida...my entire shoe wardrobe has to change and that is hard but I know I will manage and I am soo very thankful that I still have a foot to wear shoes on at all :)

I also lost my contact in the accident,soo I have been wearing the spectacles every day and that is also not what I am used to...Now I am driving a car that was meant for my son...its almost identical to a car I bought when I was 23 years old ~ 1991 Toyota Celica ( 17 years old but runs great) and at least its paid for...change happens every day in out lives and its a matter of how we react to those changes that make us who we are to ourselves and others...I am soo very thankful to have Frankie in my life ~ I don't know how I would have made it without his love and support and he still loves me ~ even with the changes..its a beautiful thing!!

My son Garrett has a job as a server and is doing well with it ~ He made me soo very proud of him yesterday.. he finally made tip money Wednesday night ~ he rides the city bus after school to the local mall down the street from our house...He met a young man 19 years old on the bus that was 'down on his luck' yesterday and G offered to buy him lunch ~ they shared lunch and conversation together before parting ways... I am proud that I raised a young man who is not self involved and willing to lend a helping hand to even a total stranger! I am also glad they were in a very public place (the mall) crowded with people, that's the mom in me wanting him to stay safe! G just wanted to make siure the guy got a good meal for the day.. what a blessing to have such an awesome young man for a son!!

My job has Drama for the first time ever and I am not sure how to deal with it! Add 1 person to an office of 3 and it changes the dynamics of everything!! I am tolerating a 'tweety bird' brain and still maintaining my sanity.. its all about attitude dahlings!

I am looking into other ways of making money on my own.. I really miss event planning and catering but cannot stand on my feet for 12 hours for an event right now so I will make baby steps back into that world... in the mean time, I have to generate income doing something I love, can get excited about and believe in completely.. I think I may have found something, just doing a little more research first.

I am itching to start using my new laptop to begin to write my first books...I think I may have to set aside time for myself a few times a month to do just that and nothing else.. this is when a houseboat would really come in handy :)

I have rambled on long enough and must get back to work....and daydream of the things to come.... Life is but a dream....